Let’s be honest, when you first hear about affirmations, they can sound a bit fluffy, can’t they? All this talk of “positive vibes” and repeating phrases in the mirror might feel a little awkward, especially if you’re new to it. But here’s the thing, affirmations aren’t about pretending that life is perfect or burying your head in the sand. They’re about rewiring your mindset and shifting the way you speak to yourself, which can be a complete game changer once you get the hang of it.
In fact, you probably already affirm things to yourself all the time without realising it. Saying things like “nothing ever works out for me” or “I can’t do this” or “I’m not good enough” are all examples of how we negatively affirm things to ourselves. Sound familiar? For a lot of us talking this way to ourselves has been programmed in to us, it becomes a second nature. But the good news? You can absolutely change it.
In this guide, I’m going to walk you through exactly what affirmations are, why they work, and how you can use them in a way that actually makes a difference, not just a few minutes of feel-good fluff, but real, lasting change. I’ll even give you some examples and a guide on how to make your own affirmations, specific to you. And the amazing thing is, the more you expose yourself to positive affirmations, the more you open yourself up to the good in the world, and start seeing the good in you too.
What Exactly Are Affirmations?
At their core, affirmations are simple statements you repeat to yourself to help shape your beliefs. Words have power and when you speak them you are making a statement or a declaration about what you believe to be true.
As I have mentioned, whether you realise it or not, you’re already using affirmations every day. The problem is, most of them are probably unhelpful.
Common negative affirmations can be things like:
“I’m rubbish at this.”
“I’ll never be able to do that.”
Or the classic, “I’m not good enough.”
So the idea behind using positive affirmations is to flip that inner dialogue on its head and start programming your mind to work for you, not against you.
Why Affirmations Actually Work
Now I know what you’re thinking, “Can telling myself something really change anything?” And the answer is, absolutely, yes.
Our brains are amazing, but they’re also a bit lazy. They believe what they hear the most, especially if it’s coming from us. When you repeat a statement often enough, your mind starts treating it as fact, which means you’ll start noticing opportunities, ideas, and behaviours that match that belief. It’s like tuning into a new frequency, suddenly what once felt out of reach starts feeling possible.
Think about it this way, chances are, there’s something you were told repeatedly as a child that stuck with you. Maybe it was a compliment like, “You’re so clever,” or on the flip side, something more negative like, “You’re always so clumsy.” Whether it was true or not didn’t matter, hearing it over and over again shaped the way you saw yourself.
That’s the power of repetition. And affirmations work in exactly the same way. The more you repeat something, the more your brain starts to accept it as truth, and once that belief is in place, your thoughts, actions and even your habits will start to shift to match it.
How to Write Affirmations That Stick
If you want your affirmations to actually make a difference, you need to craft them properly. Here’s how:
1. Keep Them in the Present Tense
Drawing on Neville Goddard’s Law of Assumption here, you need to write your affirmations as if they’re already true. So instead of saying “I want to be confident,” you’d say “I am confident.” Your brain needs to hear the version where you’ve already got what you’re working towards.
Your brain doesn’t actually know the difference between something that’s real and something you’re vividly imagining or repeating. The more you say it, the more believable it becomes. In the beginning it might feel a bit delusional but that’s the whole point, you’re training your mind to see a new possibility until it starts feeling natural.
2. Make Them Positive
Focus on what you do want, not what you don’t want. Rather than saying “I’m not anxious anymore,” try “I am calm and in control.” Words have power, use them wisely!
3. Keep Them Short and Clear
The simpler the better. A sentence or two is more than enough. You want something you can repeat easily without tripping over your own tongue.
4. Make It Personal
Your affirmations should feel believable. If something feels a little too unbelievable, tweak it so it sits right with you. You can always shift the wording as your confidence grows.
How to Use Affirmations in Your Day to Day Life
Right, so you’ve got your affirmations, now what? This is where consistency comes in.
– Morning Mindset
Say your affirmations out loud when you wake up. It might feel odd at first, but it sets the tone for your whole day. You’re planting the seed before your mind gets too busy with distractions.
– During Quiet Moments
Stuck in traffic, waiting for the kettle to boil, out walking the dog, these are all perfect times to repeat your affirmations and really let them sink in.
– Pair Them With Visualisation
When you say your affirmation, take a second to picture it being true. The clearer the mental image, the more powerful the effect. In fact, this is the same principle behind Neville Goddard’s SATS technique (State Akin to Sleep), where you visualise your desired outcome just before drifting off to sleep. This is a time when your subconscious mind is especially open to suggestion.
I won’t dive too deep into SATS here but if you’re curious, I’ve got a separate post all about how to use it here. It’s a brilliant way to supercharge your affirmations.
A Few Affirmation Ideas to Get You Started
You’ll probably want to create your own eventually, but here are a few to inspire you:
- I am worthy of success and happiness
- I trust myself to make the right decisions
- I am becoming more confident every day
- I have everything I need to overcome challenges
Stick them somewhere you’ll see them often — your mirror, your phone background, or even the fridge. The more you see them, the more natural they’ll start to feel.
And if you’d like a bit of help getting started, I’ve got a variety of guided affirmations over on my YouTube channel, which you can listen along to anytime.
Affirmations aren’t about lying to yourself or ignoring reality. They’re about choosing the kind of inner dialogue that helps you grow, rather than holding you back. When you approach them with the right mindset and a bit of patience, they can transform the way you see yourself and the way you move through the world.
So give it a go — start small, stay consistent, and watch what happens.
